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Unemployed, unmarried, and pregnant with my first baby...
about
Name: NikkiNQ
From: California
About the blog: Only two months before my 21st birthday, I found out I was pregnant.
My family has been supportive, and I've written this blog to share thoughts about the ultrasounds, finding out about the test,
and more with all of them.
My little girl is now a month old, and boy am I ready for her to be sleeping through the night! Honestly, nursing her has gotten easy. In fact, twice now I've fallen asleep while she's eaten. Just last night, I did that, and I woke up to find her waking to fuss for food. I have to use nipple guards because I have flat nipples, and she had somehow managed to pull the nipple guard off of me and stick it to the side of her face. I honestly wish I had taken a picture!
Although my little girl's due date was January 8, 2010 evidently she was in some kind of rush because she was born December 24, 2009 instead. She was born at 2:32 pm on Christmas Eve, and she was only 6 pounds and 14 ounces. My boyfriend made it to her birth and even got to see me going through all of the labor agonies. My decision to do a completely natural birth died about seven hours into labor. Contractions are HELL, and I eventually caved and got the epidural. I can't tell you how much better I felt after that. The pressure I felt at the end in order to push her out didn't hurt anywhere near as much as labor did.
I will have photos up of her soon as well as her two-day hospital stay because of a high bilirubin level of 24.4. Anyway, just wanted to let you all know that my little girl has come to join us.
Today I began some parenting classes through an organization called Rose of Sharon. Basically, this organization helps women in crisis pregnancies so being unemployed and unmarried kind of makes me a woman with a crisis pregnancy. Anyway, moving on.
So, tonight was the first lesson. We spent about fifteen minutes going around the room introducing ourselves. There are seven pregnant women in this class. After going around introducing ourselves, we got into the rules and the points system. We can do specific projects for this class to earn some points to get free baby stuff. This organization is really nice and runs solely on donation.
This class is mainly focusing on something called Parent-Directed Feeding (PDF). It sounds kind of scary, doesn't it? After all, people say you're not supposed to schedule your newborn. Doctors also say not to feed the baby every time it cries. A baby cries for many reasons, and food is just one of them. So, we basically went through "chapters" 1 and 2 of this book on Parent-Directed Feeding, and I use the term "chapters" lightly because they're actually segments though the teacher refers to them as chapters.
It was all very fascinating, helping you set a healthy schedule for your baby so that their metabolism settles in early, and they sleep through the night faster if you use this system. There's all kinds of other benefits too, but I'm not going to get into that. So, what I've decided, since this class runs every Wednesday from 6pm-8pm for six weeks, is that I would write a little blurb about the class in my pregnancy blog. Makes sense, doesn't it? After all, this blog is to remember everything that happened during the pregnancy. Can't wait to start a newborn blog.
So, I'm kind of tired of all the usual lullabies people do for their babies. You know the ones: Rock-a-by Baby, and blah. Honestly, I don't even get "Rock-a-by Baby". What is the baby doing sleeping in a crib in a tree? And why are we so soothing and calm about the wind blowing and making the cradle fall? "Down will come baby--cradle and all." Yes, that's really something I want to sing to my infant. Who the hell comes up with this shit? Pardon my French. Anyway, so I took a song from the movie "The Prince of Egypt." Granted, it's not that much better considering she's singing this song to him as she places him in the basket and lets him float down the river, but it's still much more loving than "I'm gunna put you in a cradle in a tree and watch as you fall down when the wind blowsss". So, here's the video as well as written links. Pardon any mistakes in the lyrics. I just copied them down from the video. Also, I'm probably only going to sing the first half of the lullaby.
Hush now, my baby
Be still love, don't cry.
Sleep as you're rocked by the stream.
Sleep and remember my last lullaby
So I'll be with you when you dream.
River, oh River
Flow gently for me!
Such precious cargo you bear.
Do you know somewhere he can live free?
River, deliver him there.
Today is the little-known holiday of Grandparents Day where we all go out to celebrate those who gave birth to those who gave birth to us! Wow, that was just a bit confusing... So, to honor this holiday, I decided to write a blog post about what Grandparents' Day is, when it got started, and why this deserves mentioning in my pregnancy blog. Yes, this seems like a topic for UNCENSORED, doesn't it?
So, I'll start with why this needs mentioning in my pregnancy blog. Duh! For the most obvious reason, my parents are soon to be grandparents, and little Adelie (baby girl growing in my belly right now), wanted to wish her grandparents a Happy Grandparents' Day! Well, we can't really know for sure if that's what she wanted to do, but I'm sure she did. A mother knows their child, right?
Now, how did National Grandparents Day get its start? Well, according to the official website for this holiday, President Jimmy Carter (lucky president, getting to make all these awesome holidays) "proclaimed that National Grandparents Day would be celebrated every year on thefirst Sunday after Labor Day." ("National Grandparents Day" website) This began in 1978 during his reign as our president. (Why do I always use the word "reign" when referring to the president? Hmmm. LOL)
There's all kinds of really cool stuff on this Grandparents Day website including the winner of the Grandparent of the Year award, who is Martha Barbis this year. There's all kinds of other fun stuff to look at on that website so you should definitely check it out. Have a great Grandparents Day!
SOURCES/INTERESTING LINKS: *Pardon the non-MLA style. It gets boring after a while.*
Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.
Month Two
Mommy
Today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me,
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.
Month Three
You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.
Month Four
Mommy
My hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.
Month Five
You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?
Month Six
I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!
Month Seven
Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.
One more heart that will never love.
If you're against abortion, re-post this
This really made me cry, being pregnant right now. Even before I was, I never thought a baby was just a fetus. If it is, where does the baby come from? This poem is a little off in saying that the baby is 8 inches long during the first month. After all, I'm almost 5 months pregnant, and my baby is barely 7 inches, which is normal. Even so... This poem really hit my heart hard. Pass it on. It's really very touching. I don't know who wrote it. I found it on a profile on Fanfiction.net.
Today, I went for my second ultrasound. According to the paperwork they gave me, I need to have a full bladder, and in order to do that, I had to drink about 32 oz. of water an hour before my apartment. Let's just say, when I walked in there, my bladder was definitely full. They don't warn you that the ultrasound technician is going to be poking and prodding you all over. I have a little bit of fat where the baby is located right now, and she pushed that fat INTO my pelvic bone. Oww...
So, then she continues moving that ultrasound thingy around on my pelvis and abdomen, and wouldn't you know it? She starts stabbing my bladder with it. Gah! I already have to pee, stop making it worse! I mean, really... So, after what seemed like forever, she told me to go call in my family. No, correction, she said, "You can go get your husband." Well, nice thought, but I don't have one. Not yet anyway. But I still love my bear. We'll get to husband and wife status eventually. :) So, I walked down the hall to grab my mom, dad, and sister.
Walking on a full bladder is terrible. Being unable to pee still is even worse. So, then we walked into the room together, and I laid back down for more poking and prodding. It wasn't as bad since she already knew where the baby was. she printed out some really nice photos of the baby then moved the ultrasound thingy around some more until she was underneath the baby. And there she announces, "Definitely a girl." YAY!!!!
The photos will be coming soon. Please be patient. One of them is of her lying curled up. It's a good image of her face, body, and spine. The other is either blurry or just a view of her back.
Week sixteen is almost over for baby's development, and I thought it was the perfect time to write a little post about him or her. This post will include pictures I got from the web as well as information regarding her development. I'm gunna start it off with little quick facts in a simple list.
Quick Facts About Baby
Size: 4 1/2 inches from head to rump. This is about the size of an avocado.
Weight: 2.8 ounces. This is about 1/4 of a cup, not very much at all!
Special New Developments: Baby's legs and arms can move, the legs are now longer than the arms, and baby can wiggle and stretch! For some, you can start to feel the baby move. It feels like a fluttering in the stomach.
My personal belief is that my baby is a girl. I won't know until my next ultrasound in August, but I really, really, really, REALLY think it's a girl. So, the wiggling and stretching of baby seems to me to be like dancing! I have felt a few flutters, but not many. The good news is that my diet has improved, and morning sickness has all but left for now. I only get nauseous when I haven't eaten for a while.
I'm getting more calcium in my diet now too. I have regular milk with lactose in it. My family tends to drink Lactaid, a brand of milk that doesn't have lactose in it. They're all lactose-intolerant. As far as I know, I'm not. So, now I have regular milk which has 35% of the calcium I need. I also have lemon yogurt to eat that has 35% calcium too!
The best part about all of this is that my belly is starting to grow too! Sure, some of it is still just flab (I'm not the most athletic person in the world, lol), but a lot of it is starting to form into a baby belly! Here's a photo that reveals more of mommy's tummy with less of a close-up on baby.
My bump is, um.... a bit bigger than that. But it's mostly fat. LOL
Today, I got to see my bear. We were pretty happy to see each other, especially because my stomach has started to show a little. I got to see him from 2 until 6, but during some of that time, we had to go by CSUSB for my little sister who soon may be going to the college. So, we got some time to really talk and have a really nice meeting.
I don't have much more I have to say about this visit. After all, what we talk about is between the two of us. Plus, we didn't even do much except watch TV then hang with my sister at her CSUSB stuff.
Today, Eddy and I got a chance to hear our little baby’s heartbeat. It was quick for a little heart, but that’s normal for a fetus. My doctor asked if I had any questions. When I said I didn’t, he told me to come back next time with a list of questions. So, I’m going to do my best to come up with some questions for him. For one, I want to ask about aspartame and the odd butt or back pain I’ve been getting.
My mom likes to tease and say it’s ’cause I sit around so much, but I used to sit around WAYYYY more. What I wonder is if maybe it’s because I’m only getting 15% of my daily needed value of calcium. Baby’s almost 15 weeks. It’s possible that the baby may need more calcium and I’m not getting the right amount. I wish I would’ve thought to ask him these before, but at least I’ve got them now. Right? Hah…
Posted on July 21, 2009 regarding a prenatal appointment on July 13, 2009
Baby’s first ultrasound was today. Of course, Eddy came with me. But so did my cousins Kirsty and Kaity (sisters), and my sister Cassandra. When I got the test done, they gave me an approximate time of how far along I was. At this ultrasound, the doctor could measure my little peanut-looking baby and give me an exact date. I am 8 weeks and 5 days along, and that was on a Monday. So, I’ve decided to keep track of the weeks that pass. If on a Monday, I was two days short of 9 weeks, then on Wednesday I would be that 9 weeks exactly. I don’t know if I can keep track as well as I hope, but we’ll see.
There really isn’t much to say about the ultrasound. At least, not something that wouldn’t gross people out. But what the heck? So, they did a pap smear while I was there for the ultrasound too. I had actually gotten one before that, maybe a month ago. I can’t remember. Even so, I had thought I wouldn’t need them to put that metal penis thing inside me again for at least a year. That’s what my doctor had said anyway. Unfortunately, my prenatal doctor did another one, and then, to my surprise, they told me they were going to be putting the ultrasound wand IN me. They put a condom on it, but it was still so gross. Poor Kirsty and Kaity… Although they didn’t complain. They even had the option to leave, but everyone stayed. My family’s great at supporting me.
My doctor asked Eddy how old he was. I’m still 20 at this time, and Eddy’s still 17. So, that’s what he told the doctor. You can imagine the shocked look on the man’s face. I don’t care what he thinks though. I love my young little bear. He’s so sweet and adorable and handsome. None of my family mind that he’s so young either. Well, aside from the fact that he’s also unemployed AND he doesn’t have a license. That part’s a little… difficult. But his age? Nah… My family has a history of young men anyway. My grandparents on both sides of the family, the woman was at least 2 years older than the man if not more. I can’t really remember exactly. But back to the ultrasound…
So, afterward, my doctor told me to make an appointment to see him again before my next ultrasound. While I was at the desk doing so, I had Eddy hold onto the little print-out of our baby. He stood there looking at that picture the whole time we stood there, and he couldn’t stop smiling. He’s going to be one proud papa when this baby’s actually born.
Written on July 17, 2009 regarding the first ultrasound on June 1, 2009
Well, something I didn’t really see coming has just popped into my life. Today, I went to Kaiser in Fontana, CA and took a certain test. If you can’t guess by now, that test was a pregnancy test. And, in case you still can’t guess from the title, that pregnancy test ended up being POSITIVE. You can imagine how surprised my boyfriend and I were. Sure, we’d always been safe using condoms and me taking the morning after pill when we didn’t. Well, somewhere at the end of March and the beginning of April, we had sex every day for four days. I’m sure this is TMI for some of my family that will read this, but I feel it’s important to track the history down. Anyway, so after four days of that, I planned to take the morning after pill. Well, there’s one problem with that idea. For those that don’t know about the morning after pill or have never taken it, you have to take this pill within THREE day, not four. So, we were basically screwed but hoping for the best.
About a week before I took the test, signs started to creep up. I would take a lot of naps, get nauseous easy, and best of all, the hormonal pregnancy emotions were kicking in! Even little things my adorable boyfriend said that shouldn’t have been taken so hard were twisted around in my emotional, hormonal head and made into something terrible that deserved tears, yelling, and a hurt ego on my part. And then there was my stomach. Granted, I have never been a thin person, but neither had my stomach ever been rounded muscle instead of fat. Most of my stomach is flabby, but now there was a part that was muscular and not in a sexy, flat way. Something was definitely wrong.
So, then on a Wednesday when I was supposed to have lunch with my mother, I gave her the news that I would be needing to take a pregnancy test. Let’s just say THAT was not fun considering she had no idea I was having sex in the first place. Not to mention by boyfriend is three years and 24 days younger than me. Yikes! She has this class she’s taking for the possibility of getting a bariatic surgery or something like that, and she walked into her class that day with the knowledge that her oldest daughter may be giving her a grandchild at only 40 years old. My mom is the toughest person I know! She didn’t even cry until after we got the results. I almost cried because she did!
It was my dad that we worried about for a bit. He was PISSED. Now, when a man who is an ex-Marine owns two rifles and a pellet gun that can certainly sting for days gets angry, you have to be a little concerned that your baby’s daddy may just end up dead on the 11 o’clock news. Not that I really believe my father capable of murder. But it’s funny to entertain the idea. My mom told most of her family like my aunts, her sisters, and a few other people. My dad told my grandparents on his side, and my sister told our cousin Ana on my dad’s side. So, I got the priviledge of telling my mom’s neices and nephews (my cousins) like my cousin Misti, and I got to tell most of the family on my dad’s side. Like my cousin Kirsty, her sister Kaity, and their mother Sandy.
So, all in all, it was a rather crazy day. I can’t even imagine what the rest will be like.
Written on July 17, 2009 regarding events that occured on or around May 6, 2009
None of my family mind that he’s so young either. Well, aside from the fact that he’s also unemployed AND he doesn’t have a license. That part’s a little… difficult. But his age? Nah… My family has a history of young men anyway. My grandparents on both sides of the family, the woman was at least 2 years older than the man if not more. I can’t really remember exactly. But back to the ultrasound…