If You Build It, They Will Come

I’ve been wrong before, Lord knows… but as I stand and stare out into my vast expanse of storage space, I must, once again, re-affirm my deep conviction in the existence of more duct tape somewhere in my garage.

I know it might sound strange to some people, but, even though I don’t have one piece of conclusive evidence, I still very much believe it’s there. I mean, just look around—it's a huge garage! Immense and filled with an awe-inspiring variety of odds and ends... don’t you dare call it crap! Isn’t it reasonable to think there just has to be some more duct tape out there somewhere?

My wife says that unless I can come up with some hard evidence of the tape's existence among the hundreds of boxes in the garage, that I need to go down to the hardware store and buy a some more. She just doesn't understand that it just doesn't work that way. She keeps saying, “You’re being ridiculous… just go buy a new roll and be done with it! What’s wrong with you?”

I simply don't need to, because I know--somehow, I just know—that there’s tape out there somewhere, and when the time comes that I really need that tape, it will be there for me. I'm not worried. Besides, proof of the tape's existence is all around the house, if only she’d take the time to look. For example, look at the base of that lamp… what do you see? Do you think it just fixed itself? No way, Jose, it was duct tape! If she’d open up her eyes (and her mind) she’d see for herself.

And it's the very same tape that I’m convinced, in my heart of hearts, sits out there in that garage as we speak, waiting to be of service.

Further, I don’t care that  my personal belief in my duct tape is not shared by my friend and neighbor Clifford Williams, either.  He says he only believes in what he can see and touch, not something so abstract as potential duct tape.

I can only smile and shake my head in sadness.  But, I guess I shouldn't expect him to believe in the possibility of tape, he’s never been right about anything else. Truthfully, I pity him a little. Non-believers like him spend their entire existence without any sense of wonder, any sense of the boundless possibilities. It's a big garage out there...

The saddest part is, despite my objections, my wife added duct tape to her Wal-Mart shopping list, and intends to have a new roll in the house as early as this afternoon. Life goes on, I’ll get over it…but I have a good mind to walk out into that garage, tear every box off the shelves and prove her wrong. If I didn’t think she’d kill me, I’d do it, too!