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Hey Granmom

They met every Tuesday night at Jeannie's house to practice.  Between the five of them they had thirty-five grandchildren.  And Sue's grandchild, Tim, was their publicist and promoter.  Granny Sue was the drummer and backup singer.  Granny Jeannie played the bass with Grannies Jane and Terry playing guitars and Granny Helen on keyboards.  They'd all met in college and at a time of male dominated rock, decided to take the music into their own hands.  From the early days of playing Beatles' covers to ripping through a set of Smashing Pumpkins and Alice In Chains, Sue played a backbeat to rival Ringo and Carman Appice.  She brought her three boys up bouncing on her knees to a four-four beat.  Her daughter teased on her metal sticks before there was any fear of lead in the paint.

She loved saying, "One, two, three, four," so much that all of her kids knew to countdown before saying grace or even turning on the TV.  Her five grandkids loved the fact that granny was a rocker.  So much so that most went to her with school problems long before they would even consider going to mom or dad.

The Tube Tops had one local radio hit back in the 80s entitled, "She'll Wreck Your Teeth," which was full of references to both candy and sex.  They had even opened for The Fixx once when they came to play in town.  Now they were practicing to play at Martha's (granny Jeannie's grandkid) prom.  They had to practice some slow songs - not usually on their play list.

"OK, enough slow boats. Let's hit a rocker, huh? Or I'm going comfortablly numb on ya'all," yelled Sue to no one.  "One, two, three, four..."  Sue laid down the grove and waited for the others to pick up.

Helen started banging the opening chords to "All The Way To Memphis" and the girls joined in.  Tim and Sue just laughed.  And when they got to the line about getting his hands across her state line they all screamed it at the top of their lungs. 

Gravity and time may be pulling be their bodies, and their voices may have a lost some of their youthful timbre, but there was no denying the way that they still attacked the music.  None of them could still wear the tight run-away Joan Jett leathers, but that didn't mean that they'd lost their sexy.  Jeannie could still turn heads and even the youngest fan knew that there was no rocking chair in these ladies' rockers.   Sue had already smashed through a snare head tonight and she was surely trying to kill another.  She may have always sat at the back of the band, but her drumming was always at the forefront and defined its sound - wild and nearly out of control. 

She knew that she wouldn't tell the others about her lump until after they'd played Martha's prom.  Her husband Ken knew, but no one else.  The ten of them had grown up and old together.  When Terry's husband had his two heartattacks, they all stood solidly behind her taking care of her kids while she nursed him back to health.  Sue took her two youngest for six months.  She even taught Bobby to play some mean licks with her hot sticks. 

Now they open every gig with Moby Grape's "Hey Grandmom" and laugh throughout the whole song.  Sue's youngest grandkid, Robby, had written his school paper about his drumming granny.  No finger cakes and tea for this group.  They didn't drink beer like they use to and the six pack may have one left over, but they were still young enough to rock and roll and certainly not old enough to die.

Comments (5) Permalink September 30, 2007